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Do you need love in a marriage?

Everyone wants to love. This is inherent in our souls. That is why we can listen to songs and read books about this great feeling every day. Almost every feeling that arises in our soul is somehow associated with an excess or lack of love. One of the special qualities of this feeling is that it is elusive. When we are in search of it, the search is not crowned with success, and when we do find it, the question of saving arises. Sometimes we think that the secret of love is very simple, and it has long been solved, but then we have to be embarrassed by the realization that we do not understand it at all.

What does love need? How do you know what she wants at a particular moment? What do you do when love doesn't develop the way you want it to? Love has its own desires, which must be listened to. Love has its own pace and rhythm. By awakening love before it wants to, we force it to skip certain stages. Thus, immediately begins the stage to which love has not yet matured. It should move gradually, there should be stops and pauses that need to be treated accordingly.

Before settling in our heart, love settles in the unconscious part of our soul, which in psychology is described as the subconscious, i.e. the instinctive, animal part. The teaching of Hasidism says that this part of the soul is in the "superconsciousness", on a spiritual level. The subconscious is a mundane quality, and the superconscious is a sublime and spiritual feeling, the essence of which we can not know.

Hasidism explains that the root of our soul and the souls of our future or present spouse are closely related to each other, i.e. we have the same spiritual root. The soul of every woman and man is similar to the desire to meet their half, resulting in a marriage Union. They have the same root, but at the same time, when descending into the material world, they separate, grow in different bodies and search for each other for a certain amount of time.

This means that despite the fact that in this world two separate souls live in different flesh, in their highest root, they are still connected. Do not forget that this unity of men and women is unconscious. If every person was aware of this, then it would not be necessary to make any effort to find the second half. However, almost always, this task is difficult, and love at first sight is a real miracle.

If we consider this question from the perspective of Judaism, it is important to understand that love is not only the embodiment of strong emotions that people share with each other, not only hormones and a kind of refuge from the modern world filled with indifference. This is a manifestation of the Divine light that is clothed in the senses and flesh of a person. When true love is shown between a man and a woman, their home becomes brighter regardless of the situation. If there is love in the house, it is always quiet. If a sensitive guest enters such a house, they will not be able to miss it, even though the dishes are not washed and the mess is not there. In Hebrew, there are two concepts that denote the attainment of maturity, which is necessary for marriage – the achievement of maturity (in relation to men), the term of the bride (in relation to women).

Love is nothing but the superiority of the human soul over the body. It's not just compassion for another person. This is more than just an exchange of feelings. This is a Real divine act that allows you to nourish the soul of another person, just like your own.


Children should be children! Let them do it!

Every child should know that they are a child! This is the only way he can get the Foundation that will be used to successfully build his adult life. If the parents treat the child as a small adult, it does not help him grow in any way. Some children may show excellent intelligence and great prospects, which all others confirm that the child is wise beyond his years. How to treat them? As peers or as close friends? But no matter how clear the conclusions of children are, they cannot be wise by definition. They are not based on the type of knowledge that is called Daat in Judaism. It's about the maturity of the mind, the ability to make connections, to anticipate the consequences of your ideas. It is worth noting that without Daat, these ideas have no connection with the real world.

A child may have common sense or high intelligence, but this is not Daat. For this reason, children's behavior may not always correspond to their level of understanding. Therefore, if your goal is to share your mental knowledge with a gifted child who goes to the first or second grade, then try to learn math with them for the 8th grade, but you should never discuss the basic rules of behavior. This is exclusively the competence of adults who have Daat, who have already learned what wisdom is.

If the child knows that he can get the opinion of an adult and trust him, then he will be absolutely calm. If the child managed to argue with their parents, then both the parents and he is upset. This means that you should not agree with the children. If A child comes and puts forward a good offer, you must first listen to him and answer that you will think about it. The main thing is to give the impression that the final decision will still be yours.

You should never say that the child is right, as this will force him to take responsibility for his own decision. This responsibility should rest entirely on you! If You act in agreement with the child's offer, and it does not work, then you are also responsible for it. All you need to do is praise the child for a great idea, but create a kind of insurance so that he can realize that the final decision was made by an adult.

Many of us expect too much from children at the same time. Someone simply confuses the moral development of the growing up. There is a big difference in behavior that is typical for a child, with behavior that is not typical for children. The greatest frustration that accompanies parenting is the constant repetition of simple truths on the part of parents. For example, you tell him that you need to put things away or you can't get candy out of the closet, and he doesn't listen and continues to bend his line. In this situation, bad behavior should be stopped, but if the child is just childishly fooling around, even though it does not meet Your expectations, then maybe this is a good reason to rethink your expectations?

In any case, do not slide down. Many parents who know that their children are exaggerating or lying don't pay attention. But at the same time, if the same child took some sweets from the closet at the wrong time, then they begin to spank and scold. Here you should understand that children will climb for cookies, this is normal. But if the child started lying, then this situation should not be allowed to take its course. You can be 100% sure that after a certain time, the child will become more accurate and less sloppy, but the habit of lying may not disappear anywhere.


Are non-Jews allowed in the synagogue?

Quite an interesting question: "Can a non-Jew attend a synagogue?» Will a non-Jew be allowed in, or is the attitude of Jews towards other Nations disdainful? I will try to answer this question as clearly as possible, accessible and detailed.

Straight to the point. It is not forbidden for non-Jews to visit the synagogue! However, for regular visits to the synagogue, the elders must be warned that You are not a Jew. This will avoid many awkward situations and misunderstandings. It is also worth paying attention to the fact that in view of the alleged unwillingness to let anyone into the synagogue, there are ideas that Jews treat these people with disdain. In due time, God brought the Jewish people to mount Sinai and granted the Torah, making a Covenant, making us the chosen people. At the same time, He forbade climbing the mountain (this was allowed only to Moses). He forbade us to enter! This raises a question. Does this look like a sign of neglect? Further, the most high commanded the Jewish people to build a Sanctuary divided into certain zones. Some of these areas were not allowed to be entered by anyone other than clerics. This also looks like a sign of neglect!

And if we consider operations in hospitals. As we know, relatives are not allowed in the operating room, and this can also be seen as a sign of neglect. In Hinduism, there are many laws that are designed to maintain a very clear distance between Jews and non-Jews. However, we can say with great confidence that all these restrictions are in no way related to neglect.

Will a Christian be allowed into the synagogue?

There are no obstacles for a Christian to visit a synagogue. The only thing that can be asked at the entrance is for the person to put a kippah on their head, which is also offered in the synagogue. However, any other headwear, hats or baseball caps will also work instead of a kippah.

As for the benefits of visiting the synagogue by Christians, the question is twofold. If you will be interested in listening to readings from the Scriptures, voiced in an incomprehensible language, then you can safely go and listen. Many Jews, during the Sabbath synagogue services that are held on the territory of the former Soviet Union, also do not understand what is said in the reading from the Scriptures, because they do not know Hebrew. It is also worth noting that in many synagogues, services are held rather irregularly, due to the lack of minyan, i.e. the minimum required number of Jewish men in ten people.

When it comes to the situation on the territory of the former USSR, today the synagogue is not the best place to preach the gospel. This is true if only for the reason that sometimes it is difficult to find anyone there at all, even on Shabbat. There are situations when non-Jewish Christians find God's call in the Scriptures to testify to the Jews about salvation through Yeshua the Messiah. Many Jews in the former Soviet Union are now outside the synagogue. If non-Jewish Christians want to witness salvation to a Jew, they don't have to do it in a synagogue right now.


What should a person do who constantly fails and commits the same sin?

The situation when people repeatedly face failures and commit the same sin is not new. This is not surprising, and if such people are trying to find answers, then they are already on the right track. So, let's try to figure out what to do to a person who constantly commits the same sin. We are talking about the "Avira" (the offense) and repent in this offense (Teshuvah). But after repentance, after a certain time, the person again fails to cope with himself and commits the same sin. In this situation, you can despair, but do not do it. There is always a way out.

No matter how easy it may seem, but the advice is one – never give up! In the book of Mishlei (Proverbs of king Solomon), you can read a very famous and powerful line: "Seven times the righteous will fall and rise." Many people have questions about why this book is about a righteous person, and not about an ordinary person. If he falls so many times, how can he be righteous? The answer is simple enough. He is a righteous man, for the very reason that after falling, he gets up again. After each fall, people should think and draw conclusions: "why were they so careless and why did they commit the same sin over and over again?»

At the same time, in no case should you fall into despondency, because sadness and despondency are the main obstacles and obstacles. Of course, a person can be very angry with himself for the fact that this time he had the imprudence to think that he would succeed, although there were many similar situations before. He must know and be prepared for the fact that in a particular place he may stumble and fall again.

After that, the person needs to impose certain restrictions on themselves. When it comes to questions of sanctity, he must set certain limits for himself. All that is required of him is to start watching where he is looking and what he sees. Hazel said: "the Eye sees and the heart desires".

A person looks where he should not look at all, which is why the inciting occurs, and after that, there is no longer an opportunity to pull himself together and control himself. After each new fall occurs, the person learns. He already has experience, and knows what to do to avoid falling down next time. A good example is young children who are just beginning to learn to walk on their own. Remember what the child does? He starts walking, falls, then cries, gets up again and falls again, gets up again and falls again, and then starts walking more and more confidently. Each of us has passed through this path.

However, think about what would happen if a child started walking, fell, then got up and fell, looked up at his mother and said that probably walking is not for him at all. But the child does not choose the path of just sitting quietly on the sidelines with all his small failures. If that were the case, this child would still be sitting on the sidelines. But in our personal experience, each of us has learned that staying on the sidelines is not an effective method. You have to get up and eventually go.

All the commandments given by the Lord in the Torah, every prohibition that He established, every sin that people are forbidden to commit – it is in our power to succeed in fulfilling the prescribed. If we didn't deal with temptation, we wouldn't get precious experience. If the Torah says that something is forbidden, it means that a person has the strength to control himself and overcome his desires. Over time, a person becomes more and more perfect, but at the same time, on the way to this perfection, he should not be discouraged in any case.



Why should a Jew eat only kosher food?

Is it really so important to God that a Jew eats kosher? What difference does it make to the Almighty whether a Jew eats a sausage, a pig, or any other?

If you look at the meaning of the commandments to eat kosher, you should initially agree that food is our life. After we eat something, it becomes our blood and our flesh. Food becomes our energy. Eating non-kosher food, its impurities penetrate into every system of our body and remain there. Here you should know about the differences, that there are different levels of kosher, what exactly should be consumed in food to maintain your health at an optimal level.

Each of us knows that it is important to eat healthy and healthy food. It is the key to good health. However, we should also eat kosher food to maintain our mental health. In their teachings, the sages focused on the fact that non-kosher food numbs the heart, which later becomes the main problem of a person. Closed heart for spirituality, can not perceive the words of the Torah. Such people can go on living without even knowing that something is wrong with them. This situation is very similar to the situation with a patient who does not yet know about his illness, so he is not burdened with the search for the necessary medicine or treatment method.

People who eat non-kosher food are gradually moving away from the Supreme, and even they do not feel it themselves. For this reason, in order to bring yourself closer to the Supreme and not fall into a state of" stupefaction " of the heart, it is important to strictly monitor kashrut and strive to ensure that your home has kosher food and the same products.

It should be understood that to prepare kosher food, as well as to open a kosher store, you will need much larger financial investments, unlike non-kosher ones. The owner of a store with kosher products pays money to the person who monitors the kashrut, so that the store or restaurant is kosher. At the same time, products must be kosher, and appropriate cleaning must be carried out. The supervisor can also impose a ban on the use of already purchased goods and products. In any case, a kosher dish will have a higher price, since a lot of money is invested in it.

Unfortunately, many people prefer to eat in non-kosher restaurants, and they have their own reasons for this. The first of them is lower prices. The second is the location of the restaurant. If the institution is closer, then many people are more profitable to visit them. For this reason, it is important to try to visit catering establishments with kashrut. It doesn't have to be special, just ordinary.

It is also important not to forget about the kosher nature of products that may often contain insects. We are talking about vegetables or fruits. The point is that a person who eats an insect by mistake violates several of the Torah's commandments.

It is important for each of us to try to choose only kosher establishments, because even such prosaic things as food have a very strong influence on us not only physically, but also spiritually. For this reason, always try to eat food that will elevate you spiritually.


Are Jews who were not born Jews equal to Jews who were born Jews?

Consider the situation when a full-blooded German becomes a Jew. Will he be equal to a full-blooded Jew-Jew, provided that the German accepts Judaism and fulfills all the laws of the Torah, and that the Jew does not fulfill his religious duties and is just a Jew? The question is quite unusual, I was asked by a good German friend, asking whether a non-religious Jew would be better than a German who converted to Judaism or Vice versa.

I will try to answer the question immediately, and then we will go into more details. In fact, the answer to the question is contained in the question itself. The Supreme evaluates us according to the compliance of our behavior with the requirements. Without any doubt, a full-blooded German who adheres to the laws given to Noah, and even more so a past giyur who lives according to the laws of the Torah, will be better than a Jew who violates these laws-a Jew by birth. This statement is trivial, since it follows from the definition of the concept of the commandment.

If you compare two people who adhere to the commandments or two people who equally do not fulfill them, then there are difficulties with the answer to the question. In such a situation, to give an assessment, it is necessary to take into account how high-quality the actions are, their spiritual fullness, certain circumstances that prevent them from being performed. Of course, such assessments can be given by one Supreme, for whom the hearts are open, who can take into account all the nuances. Therefore, we will narrow the wording a little – which merit is greater: acceptance of the giyur or gentility (birth in a Jewish family)?

Again, if we consider these properties as advantages, then each will have its own individual advantages. Thus, the revelation of the prophecy and the birthright are closely related (despite the fact that there was an exception in the prophecy of Ovadia). In choosing leadership, pedigree is the most important requirement. However, it is written in the Rambam code that one should love those who have joined the people of Israel. It is on such people that the Almighty turns his special love. At the same time, if you narrow the issue even more, when passing the giyur in good faith, a person acquires a great merit, for which he should receive an appropriate award. By the way, there are no rewards for birth, but the demand is higher.

If we draw Parallels between the faithful observance of the Jewish commandments and the commandments given to all mankind, the former will in any case have an advantage because they have increased requirements. In conclusion, I would like to reflect a little on the non-fulfillment of the commandments. In what situation are they worse? In this case, the picture will be mirrored. A Jew will always be charged more than the same German who converted to Judaism. Crimes committed by a full-blooded Jew will always be judged more strictly, since he was born with more.

Why are Jews circumcised?

History of circumcision

When the Jews began to practice circumcision, it is impossible to say with 100% accuracy. Some scholars agree that this rite was performed by the Edomites, Moabites, and Ammonites of Canaan, as well as by the Phoenicians and Egyptians who lived in the near East. According to historians, the Jews began to use this rite by analogy with them. The biblical prophet Ezekiel supported this initiation of boys, but at that time issued edicts that forbade circumcision, as a result, the rite became truly secret. Thus, in the second century, fathers who circumcised their sons were sentenced to death by the death penalty.

In the modern Western world, this procedure began to be widely practiced in the 60s of the last century. However, medicine still does not have a final decision regarding the need for such operations. Today, excision of the foreskin is performed both for newborn boys (with the consent of parents) and adult men.

Why are Jews circumcised?

According to the Bible, for the first time, Patriarch Abraham circumcised himself (as well as all his male relatives). The rite symbolized the agreement between the Jews and the higher powers. This is the first step on the way to purifying the soul, as well as gaining inner integrity. The rite was performed to free oneself from lowly, material, and direct communication with the higher realms, resulting in a large number of prophets in Judaism.

At what age is the ceremony performed?

According to tradition, Jewish male infants are circumcised on the 8th day after birth. But according to Jewish traditions, it is also possible to perform the procedure for men in adulthood. This is a symbol of their conversion to Judaism, the desire to fully observe the canons of faith, life according to Israeli customs.

Conversion of a non-Jew to Judaism is called "giyur" and today is performed only in hospitals, and even then under anesthesia (the procedures are performed by qualified surgeons). According to ancient sources, this rite can be entrusted to any Jewish men or even women (if there are no men). However, modern Jews still choose modern specialists from the field of medicine for the procedure.




Modern Jewish history

According to the Torah, any father should show care and perform a ceremony over his son. This is to indicate his Jewish nationality, it is a way of familiarizing him with the traditions and culture of his ancestors. At the same time, if he refuses to take this step, he can be convicted. In particular, the rite is encouraged by radical Jews and in Israel, where many emigrants undergo the rite even as adults.

However, in practice, a Rabbi cannot force parents to perform the rite on their child. According to religious canons, any child born to a Jewish mother is a priori part of the nation. For this reason, there is no need to confirm that the baby belongs to Judaism in any other way.

The social causes of male circumcision are now becoming more widespread. Where the majority of boys are circumcised, there is a desire to adhere to the norms. This is quite an important motivation. Also among the main factors that explain the high percentage of circumcision among men who immigrate to Israel from other countries is the desire to"be your own".


What kind of meat do Jews not eat and why?

Shalom friends. My name is Abram Strimban, and I have finally decided to start my own blog where I will share my thoughts about Judaism. Aimed at free expression of their thoughts. I will be glad of Your response, and not only positive. I am also ready for discussions.

In my first blog post, I would like to talk about food. Many people know that no country in the world has such strict restrictions on the use of certain products as in Israel. I want to talk about why Jews are not allowed to eat pork, horses and hares, what seafood and poultry are forbidden for Jews to eat.

How did it happen that certain types of meat were banned in the Holy Land? There are several versions of the answer to this question. The main reason is religious. However, it is also legislative. The Koran and Torah state that pig meat is forbidden to Jews and Muslims. During the transcription of records, scientists found that the pig was classified as a "dirty" animal because of the use of dirty food. Some scientists see the cause in the frequent viral, bacterial, and parasitic diseases that these animals are highly susceptible to.

As for the more correct version, it is associated with the term "kashrut", meaning the permissiveness of certain actions based on Halakha (rules for believing Jews, which are contained in the Torah). Thus, the list of kosher and non-kosher products for Jews is determined by the rules of kashrut. Next, we will talk about what meat is allowed to eat in Judaism, and what is strictly forbidden.

If we talk about animal meat, it is allowed to eat only the meat of sheep, cows, goats, deer and elk (i.e. animals with "paired hooves" that feed on grass). The fact is that there are animals that meet only one of the above requirements, the meat of which is prohibited (horses, pigs, hares, camels, damans). Despite the fact that camels and pigs are cloven-hoofed, they are not ruminants. Hares and damans eat grass, but their legs do not move apart.

As for poultry meat, Jews only eat domesticated chicken, duck, pigeon, quail, Turkey, or goose. It is also allowed to eat their eggs. However, there are also prohibitions here. Kosher-an egg that has one pointed tip and the other rounded. So, it is forbidden to eat eggs with the same tips belonging to scavengers or birds of prey.

Also, you probably know that Jews do not eat all seafood. The reason for this is kashrut, according to the laws of which it is allowed to eat fish with scales and fins. At the same time, the scales should be easily separated from the body by the nail. The category of non-kosher fish in Israel includes sturgeon and shark, river eels, predatory European catfish and anglerfish.